Being "In Shame"

So this blog has become more of a sounding board when I've got thoughts I want to get out than anything else really- and that's 100% ok with me. Things like this are really too long for a Facebook status, but if someone else can learn from my idiotic mistakes, why not share them? I'm putting myself out there with this one, because it's not like the whole world needs to know everything that's going on and personal experiences being posted online are a scary thing- but this time I think it's worth it. I'm going to be totally honest, the past few weeks for me have been insanely overwhelming. With graduation just around the corner, no plans, no savings, and pressure from all sides to keep trucking along without even sputtering for a second, I've done what I know a thousand other seniors before me have done, and a thousand seniors after me will do: I choked. School slipped, friends slipped, my whole life slipped, and even though it was just for a brief second, it was enough to do some damage. The worst part is, when we let our own lives become overwhelmed and we don't immediately address it, its not just us that gets hurt. Damage is never isolated to a single person.

 Enter Tumblr and Brenee Brown.

If you haven't read anything by Brenee Brown, you're missing out. "Self-help" books aren't everyone's cup of tea, but remember I'm a social-worker-to-be so I eat this stuff up. Generally I'm like "oh my gosh, all these skills and insights are going to be great to share with future clients!" but what's really happening is I end up thinking "oh my gosh, I should be someone's client because all of this stuff makes me realize all the dumb things I do." And if you don't like to read, at least watch her TED talk- because she's amazing. Anyways, I'm reading over the Gifts of Imperfection again before we discuss it in class, and I come across something that kind of punched me in the gut. "When we're in shame, we're not fit for human consumption. We need to get back on our emotional feet before we do, say, e-mail or text something that we'll regret." which reminded me of a Tumblr post that I reblogged at some ungodly hour last night: "Just because you've been hurt doesn't mean you're allowed to hurt people/ if you're toxic, put yourself in isolation, be by yourself and heal/ so you don't contaminate others". I can't even begin to explain how true this is- and it's an ugly vicious cycle. When we're "in shame", we're toxic to others. I was ashamed that my grades weren't top notch, that I fell behind in homework, that I wasn't able to be at every friend event there was, that I wasn't loving and taking full advantage of every opportunity that was being thrown at me. That shame turned me into such a toxic person and it completely rubbed off on people around me- my shame bubbled over and infected other people, and for that I will always be sorry.

I'm not saying anytime you're feeling overwhelmed you should pull away from everything and everyone. That's not healthy for anyone unless that's truly your coping mechanism. Complete isolation for me is probably the worst thing possible because I push myself into a spiral where I just get more upset with myself. But knowing this about yourself- what's healthy and what's not healthy for you- that's invaluable. Brenee says earlier in her book "As a matter of fact, we are wired for connection. It's in our biology." Our world is not conducive to isolation. We've been trained, we were born with, we evolved to have, we were created with, (take your ideological pick) an inherent need to connect with others. But when that connection is contaminated by our shame or our doubt or our insecurities, it's a flawed connection. It's ironic that we're wired for connection, when "one of the greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on 'going it alone'." Do you see the conflict here?

Our design is to connect, but our culture pushes disconnect- and sometimes it pushes disconnect under the guise of connection. It's a complex, mixed up, tangled web. It's so disgustingly difficult to navigate, and even more challenging trying to navigate it alone.

I guess what I'm saying is everyone feels shame, disappointment, overwhelmed, and a thousand other emotions that are none too pleasant. Deal with them, before they take over your life and the life of everyone around you. Find out how you cope. Find out how you can deal. If it's taking a 10 minute breather, if it's sitting down and writing out your thoughts, if it's venting to a friend or a therapist (just make sure it's productive and not a pity party), if it's going on a run or out for a night with friends. And whatever you do, DON'T ignore it or think that you have to go it alone, because you never do.

A Week in the Life

So, I've been back a little less than a week and I've already fallen back into old routines. For those of you who didn't know, I'm in Oxford right now. I'm on another study abroad trip through ACU and I couldn't be happier. I got into London on Friday around noon, local time, spent a couple days there, and headed to Oxford on Sunday. It's been a quick few days, and it's not like I've seen a ton of stuff, but I'm so happy to be back. Everything I've done isn't new to me so I feel like posting about it would be slightly repetitive, except for Borough Market. I can't even explain in coherent words how much this place is my mecca. For a foodie traveler, this place has it all- fresh vegetables, meats of every variety (and I mean EVERY variety, there was even a kangaroo burger), TRUFFLES, aged cheeses, olives, ales, wines, vinegars, oils, breads, jams, I could probably go on for a day and half and still not cover it all.

 The "official" Borough Market stand, where you can buy aprons, bags, coolers, potholders, and more. I of course, bought a re-usable grocery bag- so much better than carrying around all the plastic sacks from various vendors. ;)

Anyways, I probably spent more there than I should have, but when in Rome (or in this case, London), right? I think the food is my favorite part of traveling. The way things are cooked, what's available in the region, it all part of the culture of a city, of a country, even. I think it speaks volumes about the culture and the way people live, even in this day and age where you can have stuff flown in from the coast and on a customer's plate in a matter of hours. The fact that I see leek and potato soup everywhere I go, and local ciders each have a distinct flavor of their region amazes me because it speaks so much to how the people live.

Other than the food market in London I spent some time in Camden (yay cheap Chinese food and horse-stall shops!) and now I'm in Oxford. We got to tour some things today that I hadn't seen the last time around, and it's so interesting to be learning the true history behind all of the things I walked by without a second thought last time. I'm taking a Europe since 1914 History course here, and these first few days are loaded with readings and assignments while we have a classroom available to us. This Thursday we'll take our first exam and head to London as a class to see the War Rooms and a few monuments before heading out to Germany- Berlin to be exact. After Berlin we'll head to Prague, Czech Republic then Leipzig, Germany to wrap up the school portion of the trip. I'm so looking forward to seeing new things and experiencing new cultures- however not looking forward to the 50 pages of reading I have to present on in just a couple of days. After school concludes I'll be heading with Regan and Hannah to Greece for a nice two-week lounge on the beach vacation before heading back to Abilene (when it comes to this point, I might flat-out refuse to return and just live on an island forever) to work and move into the new apartment. Stay tuned these next few weeks for posts, as I've got some new tech that makes it much easier to post on the go while I'm here. Here's to hoping I'll be better about it than last time!

Packing Part 1

So! I haven't gone anywhere lately, and that's totally fine with me. School has been really intense as I finish up the last bit of my Social Work coursework and prepare to start internships next semester alongside the upper level psychology courses I still lack- needless to say, I've been too busy to even think about going anywhere. I've even decided to turn down two trip offers for spring break- one to Colorado and one to Austin in order to just recharge and get my ducks in a row. But just because I haven't gone anywhere doesn't mean I haven't had any fun! A friend and I explored some local Abilene treasures and went hiking at Abilene Lake, which in my opinion is more of a murky, thick, pond at this point. I've also done some shopping (always an adventure) and bought some basics for traveling and business interviews- yay internships! No pressure at all right? And then of course I've booked some things for Europe including the resort (Thanks Liz!) that my friend's mom is letting us use her time share to rent, our flights from Greece back to London, and our round-trip flight to London to get us there and back home to Texas! As you can see, I've been a busy bee. Oh, and I almost forgot to mention, we accidentally dyed a cat pink- so there's that.

Anyways, as I near my next big trip to Europe I've been working a lot on packing efficiently and after putting my experience together with the plethora of blogs on packing light- I've decided to do a little 3-part series on packing. First (obviously, this one) is just some general packing tips as well as products that I've found to be crucial to traveling- light or otherwise. Second is going to be a specific packing post for my 32 days in Europe, which I'm packing entirely into a (large) backpack. Last, is going to be kind of a reflection once I get back from Europe on things I could have gone without and things I wish I had taken with me. All of this is in hopes that it will help someone further on down the road. Find out more about my packing essentials after the jump!

Ok, so I tried to photograph everything that's essential for me, but a few things are left out- but not to worry, I'll talk about them at the end! First up is what I pack in! If it's a trip where space is unlimited (ie- a weeklong trip to my parents house), I have a giant floral duffel bag that I got in England at Primark (Why does this place not exist in the US?) for about $30, and it's got wheels and a handle, really it's magical. Other than that, I have two hiking backpacks I like to pack in.

The first one, the larger one, is the Deuter Transit 50. You can buy it from several retailers, but after some online coupons and things that I found (just Google coupons for "store", you'll find plenty), Tahoe Mountain Sports had the best price. It's got a detachable duffel bag strap, as well as having a pocket for the backpack straps to zip up into. It's also got a removable day pack and a separate zippered space at the bottom- which were the two things I was looking for in this new backpack- the day pack for obvious reasons and the bottom pouch for shoes- to keep the smell and mud away from my clothing. The second backpack is an REI Traverse 30- which is obviously REI's personal brand. As you can see, the design has changed a bit since I bought mine three years ago- but I would still recommend it for a smaller pack if you want one for weekenders or are just a fantastically light packer. A lot of people might be thinking that $180 (which I paid much less than that for both of these) is a ridiculous amount to spend on a backpack- but it really isn't if you're planning on packing for five months in this thing, and then carrying it yourself all around various cities. Getting the right backpack is crucial to not only maximizing space, but your health. Carying a cheap backpack can really injure your back if it's too heavy, and both of these backpacks have waist straps that help take part of the load off my shoulders, as well as adequately padded straps. You can click over to where I bought each of them for full specs. Wow- obviously I could write an entire blog about the backpacks- it's just really important to find the one that's right for you- do a LOT of research, and don't just order stuff online. Go to REI and try on backpacks, find out what is comfortable for you. They even have weights to put in the backpack to help you really imagine what it's going to be like lugging these things around all the time.

Next are a few things that I consider to be for international travel only, though I suppose if you were flying or staying in a hostel in the United States, these things would be helpful then too.

1. ID tag for your luggage. I got mine from Target and it's a special ID tag that has a QR Code- which to me is a universal language (this may or may not be ethnocentric of me). It makes me feel a bit better knowing that even if they can't read what's written on the tag, they could scan the QR code and translate the information on your phone.
2. Locks. I have two different kinds here, one from REI (which is no longer available that I can find) that uses a card with holes to open it and another from Target or somewhere that's a combo lock. Both locks are TSA acceptable- which is really important, because if TSA can't open your bag, they're going to be upset with you. TSA acceptable basically means it has a keyhole that TSA will have a key for- I guess it's like a universal thing, that every agent has the same key.
3. Inflatable neck pillow. Neck pillows are really important for long car rides or flights, but especially if you're packing light, you don't want to be stuck lugging it around forever. This way, you can deflate it and put it at the bottom of your bag and forget about it till the next flight!
4. Map. This may seem silly with technology now, but when traveling internationally, it's REALLY expensive to use maps on your phone, and while many coffee shops have wifi, to me it's easier to have a map of the city I'm in with me at all times. Most tourist shops will have free paper maps, and if they're not free, they're generally super cheap- they're not mean.

Next is stuff to keep you organized. For me, traveling is insane, I'm dropping my bag in a locker, locking it, and setting off to explore the city. I don't want to spend 30 minutes looking for the right jacket or untangling my jewelry in order to get the one that I want.

1. Eagle Creek Specter Cubes. I have the compression set and the packing set- both I've found to be super useful! They are a bit pricey, so if you're thinking about investing, make sure you shop around to see who's having a sale.

2. Straws. As odd as this sounds- straws are really useful for packing necklaces! I saw this on Pinterest a while back and I'm so glad I did because it's kept my necklaces from getting tangled, a true time saver.

3. Jewelry organizer. Honestly, this is one of those plastic nails boxes from back when I was in junior high and thought that stuff was awesome, but if that seems odd to you, I'm sure amazon has a variety of cute organizers to choose from.

 4. Lined Toiletries Bag. Mine is from Soap and Glory and came in a set of 3- works great and is cute to boot. This is really important- because if you're packing liquids of any kind, if you change altitude, your bag gets squished, things open, whatever, your clothes are all getting messy- it's a nightmare. The Specter Cubes aren't waterproof like most toiletries bags, so if you pack liquids in them, they'll just leak out.
5. Other bags. Ok, so this is for those that don't feel like dropping coin on the Specter cubes- and these things work just as well. What's underneath the jewelry organizer and toiletries bag is a cloth bag that a sheet set came in. I use this for shoes, to keep mud or whatever else from getting on other things- but you can just as easily use this to organize your clothes if you have a few of them.

Next up- my beauty products. This is important for some people. For others- they just throw whatever they grab first in to a bag and that's a-ok, you do you. For me, this is close to what I use on a daily basis, but I know for some girls this is an insanely small amount of beauty products.

 1. Eyeshadow Palettes. I have a couple Wet & Wild shimmery pallets that I like to use because they're cheap and swatch similar to a few of my fave colors from the naked 1, 2, & 3, all of which were way out of my price range. ELF also has some great travel size palletes, not to mention a hundred different brands offer things that are more customize-able. Also pictured is Naked Basics, which I never leave home without.
2. LUSH. Let's just get all these products out in one fell swoop. Happiness- which is what I use as a liquid gold (or according to them bronze) eyeliner. Then there's the shampoo bar- and I honestly don't remember which one is pictured, but Jumping Juniper and Soak and Float (which was introduced to me as Smoke & Whiskey, which smells accurate) are both fantastic as well. Then there's Jungle Bar, a solid conditioner, which works for pinched travel, but honestly I'd rather have my regular deep conditioner. Next is No Drought, their dry shampoo, which is great and not in an aerosol can, which can't be taken on an airplane. Toothy tabs in various flavors- these things are awesome, and grab them while you can! The sales rep at Dallas Galleria said they're rumored to be discontinued soon. A scalp bar and soap sample- the scalp bar I can't find anywhere and might be a UK item since various countries have their own stuff- I got it in Oxford and haven't seen them since. Each Peach lotion- lotion bars are a must when my skin is being put through various climates, sunny days, and lots of other harsh conditions. Buffy- exfoliating, moisturizing, and magnifique. Last but not least is Mint Julips- a lip scrub that I can't live without. OK! I promise I wasn't paid for that LUSH plug, their stuff is just all solid and fantastic for traveling especially since they sell tins in the store that fit their products perfectly. (However, if a LUSH rep were to see this and want to thank me for promoting their products with some free swag, I would definitely never turn it down.) With LUSH products I don't have to worry about hitting liquid limits, which I'm always concerned about.
3. Basic Makeup- for me this is mineral powder and tinted moisturizer (both Mary Kay). Brown eyeliner in a felt tip pen form (ELF) and black eyeliner (Mary Kay). Mascara- whatever I happened to have picked up from CVS at the time. Urban Decay Lid Primer. Burt's Bees Lip Balm. Lipstick Queen Sinner (by Poppy) in Red and Pink, as well as matching lip liners from Walmart.
4. Body Spray- I always carry a small one from Bath & Body works, always something citrus. I've heard solid perfumes are great, but I've yet to find one that comes highly enough recommended from friends to spend the money on them. I'll probably end up trying to make my own with some shea, soy, and essential oils before the big trip comes around.
5. Deodorant. I almost always wear a man's deodorant, for several reasons. One, it works better- let's be honest, if I'm walking around with a giant backpack and the sun beating down, I'm going to need something that works. Secondly, generally if I smell like men's cologne and I'm traveling alone (and this is advice I'd received from someone else originally), I don't get hassled as much because they're always thinking about a man that's with me that's probably right around the corner. I wish the world weren't this way, but it is, and a feminist rant is now that this post needs right now. (:
6. Makeup Remover- this is just whatever brand I happen to pick up, but Mary Kay has dry makeup remover sheets that are "just add water" kinds of things, so that's one less thing to force into that quart-sized ziplock!
7. Hair ties and bobby pins, in a small ziplock. I don't use the fabric hair ties when I travel- just the small black rubber ones- they work just as fine for me.
8. Ok, last thing in this picture is a small tin, up on the top, that's moisturizer. I use Nivea soft, but use whatever you use- it's just nice to have it in a smaller travel sized container (this was originally packaging for earrings from Target).

Last are my miscellaneous items that I travel with- all of which are important.

1. Water bottle. This one is a Camelback and has the filter straw on it, because you can never be too safe!
2. Flashlight- because I've gotten caught in pitch black parts of town too many times to be comfortable.
3. Eyedrops and contacts.
4. Hair Clip.
5. Travel makeup mirror. This is from Mary Kay and stands up so that I can adjust the angle.
6. Eco Tools travel brush kit. This one is really great and even has a mini-kabuki!
7. Vitamins. Especially when traveling, you're wearing your body down by exposing it to new germs that it's not used to, not to mention you generally push yourself past what you do on a daily basis. Staying healthy while traveling is important, and be sure to take with you the types of things recommended for the region.
8. Travel Hair Tool. This one is really cool. I generally let my hair do whatever, but sometimes I like to dress up, especially when I'm having fun in a new place while traveling. This one is special because there's a switch that changes it from a straightener to a curling wand, it's miniature, and it's meant to handle dual voltages- International travelers rejoice! It's seriously the best purchase I've ever made.

Last couple things not pictured are Burt's Bee's cuticle cream, which I never leave home without. A nude, a bright and a Sparkly nailpolish (generally OPI Taupe, Revlon Apricot, and Sephora Gold), and Sea Salt Spray, currently using Got 2b's.


I feel like this post might say more about my beauty routine than how I pack.. but oh well. Hope something I said sparks an idea or helps you plan for your next excursion! Stay tuned later this week for a LONG OVERDUE post about my weekend in Paris last December.

Reflections and Fresh Starts

Ah, here it is, the obligatory reflecting post for 2013, and my often-forgotten resolutions for 2014. I love new beginnings, I'm a fresh start kind of person. We can shrug off the worries of the old year and bring in the new with fresh opportunities and the wonder in our eyes of children. It happens every year- and I love it. This past year was no doubt a difficult one, from the loss we have felt as a family to the hard work I put myself through at school, this past year really took it's toll. Amid all the struggles though- there is one thing that kept me fresh- and that is adventure. Though I spent the entire year stateside- that doesn't mean I didn't travel. Below are a few of my favorite adventures that I got to take in 2013!

Holi Festival at Tarleton State University with Regan, Jessica, Jeremiah, Liz, Audrey, and Andrea

Spring Break in Austin where I got to see my sketchbook that's now housed in the Brooklyn Art Library

 Family Vacation in South Dakota where we visited Nathan, Wall Drug, and Mt. Rushmore

 Austin City Limits Music Festival with Regan and Liz

And now for the resolutions! I'm so bad about writing posts as soon as I get back from the trip, and this year, I endeavor to do so! We have a few weekenders planned (we want to do a weekender in Shreveport this semester- and probably one in Austin, and another in Fort Worth), but the majority of my travel funds this year will be going to my next trip to Europe!

For those of you that don't know, I'm returning to Europe for about five weeks as soon as the spring semester ends- and I am very excited. Before, I did a semester long study-abroad trip that held a full course load of classes- this time, it's a single course done in three weeks. It's a class about Europe in War and Peace from 1914 to 2014, and I am very excited to be learning about the history of Europe while standing where it happened! The trip will include: Oxford and London, England; Frankfurt and Berlin, Germany; and Prague, Czech Republic. After the course ends a friend and I will be meeting another friend in Greece (yes, I finally get to go to Greece!) for my Birthday! Best present to myself- ever. I'm working really hard to pay for the trip, as things like this are quite pricey- but to me, it's worth cutting back in some places so that I can do things like this. I also learned to use my credit card wisely and earn rewards like airline miles and hotel vouchers- which has really helped in preparation for this trip. I still have a few things left to buy- as for this trip I'm not taking a suitcase whatsoever! I'll be backing in a backpack and not checking any luggage in order to cut down on flight costs, and it's a huge challenge to myself- because I never pack light! We've done some strategic planning, using shampoo bars and the like in order to carefully allot our liquid limits, and picked out the perfect backpack that has great pockets, versatile straps, and a detachable day-bag. I'm definitely looking forward to the new experience, as everywhere on this trip (excluding Oxford and London) are brand new to me!

My second resolution is one I've done for a couple years now, but this time I've chosen a more challenging version. I always pick a cookbook at the beginning of the year and cook my way through it. I generally pick small cookbooks- things that are 50 baking recipes or the like- however, this time I've chosen Williams-Sonoma's Weeknight Fresh + Fast by Kristine Kidd. I'm looking forward to trying new things, as I chose this book because the recipes were not only simple, but had a lot of ingredients I've never worked with. I love expanding my cooking skills, and the kitchen has always been my favorite room in the house, so it's only fitting that it becomes part of my resolutions.

Last resolution is to give myself some tech-free time! I'm not quite sure what this is going to look like, because turning technology off in the evenings like so many have suggested is simply not an option for a college student at a mobile-learning initiative campus. I have schoolwork, and that means using technology. I'm bumping around the idea of being Facebook free for one week a month, or maybe organizing some sort of technology free game-night with my friends that's a regular occurrence- who knows. I love that technology has become what it is- it really has made leaps and bounds that blow my mind (did you know that they're developing a 3-D printer to be used in the medical field, to grow new organs!? that amazes me). But I also firmly believe that it's taken away from our face to face contact, that oh-so-precious connection that you get when you are truly spending time with someone, engaging in life, technology can never adequately replace that, and the sad part is, it hasn't replaced it, it's shoved it out of our lives with a quick "ttyl". So this year I'm going to endeavor to become less dependant on my technology, and we'll see how it goes.

Anyways, I'm back to doing domestic things- my last chance before the semester starts. I've already made cookies and enough Prickly Pear Strawberry Jam to last a lifetime! Now I'm on to experimenting making my own chips from various fruits and vegetables! Till next time.

Christmas Greeting

Dear Friends and Family,

Some years we tumble through, laughing and tripping over each other as we merrily race from one life-goal, to the next. Some years we turn up our collars against the storms of life until, as the carol says, “The dark night wakes, the glory breaks, and Christmas comes once more.”  Most years, like this one, seem to sneak by us as we bend down to tie our shoes for the race, and when we look up, we find it is over.

The last year has been a time of change for Teresa. In December of 2012 she finished her Master’s degree in Education with an emphasis on math curriculum (something she was working on when she was moved to teaching two classes of English Language Arts, Social Studies, and Technology for 4^th grade). Teresa was moved back to second grade this year. There is some relief at not being in a grade where a standardized test is being given, but the downside is the need to become familiar with a new curriculum after having taught the same grade for five years. She is especially happy to be teaching all subjects in one self-contained class. The intensified scrutiny and micromanagement, that are now so prevalent in the public schools make teaching a less enjoyable profession than when she first began. However, her love for the children has not waned, and it is their sense of discovery that makes the job worthwhile.

Ray is still working in the IT department at Williamson-Dickie Manufacturing. The company continues to grow and evolve to meet the demands of a changing market, so he is continually finding new challenges and opportunities in meeting the demands of his job. He doesn’t get as many calls from the designers to model clothes being reviewed before production, since he has lost a little weight, but it’s a small price to pay for step toward being healthier.

Ray and Teresa continue to be very involved in church life at Fossil Creek Community Church. Their primary responsibility and greatest joy is co-teaching an adult Sunday school class. Due to a sabbatical being taken by one of the other adult teachers, their class has more than doubled in size and changed considerably in demographics, so they will start 2014 looking for new ways to present Gods word in a way that is relevant, interesting and impactful to their students. Ray was also chosen to serve on the church board and will serve for two more years. He is honored to have the opportunity to serve as a support to the ministry of our church and is blessed to work with a wonderful group of other leaders.  But after an especially lengthy recent budget meeting, he is now a proponent for padded chairs at all board meetings.

Early last year, Nathan adopted a black lab mix puppy and named her Storm. She has an exuberance for life that has kept us all on our toes. In May, Nathan moved to Huron, South Dakota to work for the city at their recycling center, work very similar to what he had been doing for a private business in Fort Worth. He called Texas many times to brag about the mild weather in South Dakota, while we were experiencing 100 degree days. We didn’t have the heart to brag, but did inquire about how he was enjoying the snow, once winter hit, way back in Octoburrrrr. Storm loved the snow and the space she had to run and play fetch, her all-time favorite game. However, due to a cutback in hours for the winter season and a lack of available housing, Nathan has decided to return to Fort Worth. He is looking forward to starting 2014 with a new job and his own apartment.

Rachel is midway through her junior year at Abilene Christian University (Go Wildcats!). This past summer, she moved off campus into a house with three roommates and is immensely enjoying having her own kitchen. She loves to cook and entertain and has been learning many new Asian recipes from one of her roommates. Rachel is seeking a double major in Social Work and Psychology with a minor in International Studies. She will begin her internships this coming year and will start applying to graduate schools, as her chosen field requires at least a Master’s degree. She still feels strongly that she would like to travel and work in the anti-human trafficking movement. Much of this type of work takes place outside the US, and since exposure to other cultures will be so important, she plans to spend five weeks abroad in Europe this coming May. This will be her second study-abroad opportunity and the third time she has had the chance to travel to Europe. Oh the difficulties of being a college student in a global culture!

All of us will be together for Christmas, an unexpected, but much appreciated blessing! Bring on the cards! Rachel and Teresa (still not a dog-lover, but definitely won over by a certain black four-legged tornado) are looking forward to spoiling Storm. Teresa has dibs on taking her through the Starbucks drive-through for a pup-uccino and Rachel plans to treat her to outings at the local dog park, saving Ray the worry of Storm’s version of landscaping the backyard. Nathan is looking forward to the warmer Texas weather and getting his fix of Texas fajitas and tacos.

2013 has been a full and blessed year for the Williams family.

No matter what kind of year you’ve had, the Christmas season offers an opportunity for us to look up from our time-bound existence and revel in the miracle of an infinite God who has, at great cost, chosen to send his Son. Through his life, death, and resurrection, Jesus provides the opportunity for us to leave the temporal and enter the infinite. We hope you will join us as we thank God for his grace and love, celebrated at this Christmas season with friends and family.

Merry Christmas,

The Williams Family

Tis the Season

So, the title of the post might be misleading- no, I'm not about to start talking about Christmas. As many people know I prefer for all talk of Christmas to be reserved for December. Call me a scrooge- I just think that too much of a good thing... well, you know. No, right now it's the season to be thankful- and with so many things going on in the world, political dissatisfaction, financial crisis, and a general lack of international peace, it can be hard to be thankful for the day-to-day. Today I found myself in exactly this same spot. Money is tight, news is grim, and a break from schoolwork grind is nowhere in sight. Now, I know it seems like I'm straying from the general theme of this blog- which is supposed to be travel, but read on and trust my judgement on this one- I promise I'll tie travel in.

Italian Adventures

So, I've just gotten back from my weekend in Austin, and oh man. I really should be studying, or writing papers, or doing any number of things that isn't writing a blog, but when I get the urge to write, I write, and Italy has been on my to-do list for months now, almost a year, which is insane to me.

But, as my laundry goes through it's spin cycle, I find myself with extra procrastinating time on my hands after tidying up and packing away my trusty duffel bag (£15 at Primark, my best purchase ever, if I do say so myself) from my last adventure, so I've decided to talk about Italy a little bit- and by a little I mean I'll keep this as brief as possible, but I LOVE to talk about Italy. The native people, the culture, the food, not to mention the company that I went on my trip with, was all fantastic. The cities we stopped at were, in order- Pisa, Genoa, Milan, Florence, Rome, Naples, and if you ask me to pick a favorite, you'd be cruel, because there's no way I can.

Adulting

So, lately I've been reading the book Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps. It's really great, and I feel no shame in reading a self-help book, because honestly, being an adult is hard work, especially when you not only have to be an adult for yourself, but because of your responsibilities to other people as well. So, as I'm reading this book, I decide that it's a good idea for me to share my 10 Steps to Adulting, made easy. Some of these, you might think, are things that I don't do- and isn't that hypocritical? Yes, there are a couple of these that I struggle with, but when I do them, I feel soo much better about myself. There are a lot of really complicated things about being responsible that make me exhausted, but for sanity's sake, here are ten that are plain simple.

One. Have a morning drink routine. For some people, it's coffee, for others it's tea, and some start off with water. But starting your day with fluids is a grade-a way to make yourself feel more confident about facing the day. I'm not generally a fan of hot drinks, so I always make a big gallon batch of peach green tea lemonade at the beginning of the week. Peach green tea lemonade is one of the most delicious things I've ever had, and rather than spending $6 on a venti one at Starbucks, or if I'm parched, a treinta- I've got my own down to a science. It's fairly simple and has four ingredients: Great Value Lemonade Powder, 1 can of Kern's Peach Nectar (sometimes found near the ethnic food section, where they have coconut water and stuff like that), Tazo Green Tea Bags (pitcher size), and water. Bring your tea bag and water to a boil, and let it boil for as long as you want your tea strong- tea drinkers will understand this. Pour the tea into a gallon pitcher, add the lemonade and peach nectar, and then fill to the top with water- it's that simple, and the only sugar comes from the peach nectar- which is natural! On days that I need a stronger dose of caffeine I have coffee frozen into ice cubes, splenda (so I'll get cancer one day, oh well), and milk at the ready for those days that I need coffee, but don't want the hot drink. Additionally, I keep a couple single serve tea bags and sweetener in my purse, so if I need a mid-day boost, I can do so by stopping by a water fountain, instead of a Starbucks.

Two. Buy nice towels. I can not even begin to explain the luxury of a wonderful towel. A nice towel can feel like you're drying yourself off with $100 bills- figuratively, obviously, because money is not really absorbent. I'm not saying go and spend fifty dollars on one towel- that's crazy talk. I'm just saying, instead of using the towels that your parents bought you your Freshman year at the dorms, invest in nice towels (I replace mine about once a year). Walmart, Target, and Bed Bath and Beyond all have a good selection of color and quality for manageable prices- so you have no excuse. Also, own more than one- and use a fresh one at the beginning of each week.

Three. Be prepared for a guest. Even if it's a friend stopping by to say hey- always keep some snacks and drinks handy. For me, this means having drink mixes on hand that you can whip up, some crackers, some cheese, and some fruit. You never know when someone will just need to talk, and company is always added to by the comfort of a snack. Additionally, if you have friends like mine, you never know when someone might need a place to say for the night. For me, this means having a couple extra throw blankets, a guest pillow (and pillow cases), a sheet set, and an air mattress (because we have a love seat, not a couch and my friends aren't munchkins). Now, when I say air mattress, I'm not saying you have to buy that luxurious double thick blah blah blah. No, they're crashing for a night, not renting a hotel room. That way, if Suzie calls at 2am because she "just needs a break from it all", you can not only offer a snack, but a night away to clear her thoughts.

Four. Vegetables. I have a lot of friends that survive entirely off of ramen noodles, microwave meals, and takeout (no judgement), but for me, that is simply not an option. Whether it's a handful of salad mix, easy to cook veggies (sliced yellow or calabaza squash and zucchini, salt, pepper, 350 degrees, 20 mins), or a fancy dish that takes two hours to make because you feel like it, have a substantial vegetable with at least one meal a day, if not two or three (veggies with breakfast is hard, I get it). An extension of this is knowing what you're going to eat. Hitting up the grocery store four times a week is counter-productive, time consuming, and silly. Think about what you want to eat that week (a general idea is fine), and get the ingredients. Also stock your general items that are easy to spruce up like a few kinds of pasta sauce and noodles. My thing is always having mac n' cheese. If you add a can of Wolf Chili and some Rotel(drained) (and because I like it spicy, Tony's and chili powder), you have chili mac- or as my friend calls it- Ghetto Mac. Judge me all you want, but it's ready in 20 minutes, easy to keep on hand, and I've never had a complaint. Knowing that you have food to eat is just one less stress during the week.

Five. Stock your medicine cabinet. So many people I know, college students and workforce-rs alike, don't have a stocked medicine cabinet. To me, who was stocking band-aids in my backpack in grade three, this seems ridiculous. This means two different types of pain relievers (for persistent and severe pain, you can alternate pain relievers every four hours, instead of 8 hours between doses), daytime and nighttime cold medicine, allergy pills, bandages (in varying sizes, but by all means, also have some power rangers ones), Bactine or alcohol swabs, triple antibiotic ointment, and  hydrocortisone cream.

Six. Know how to play at least three games with a single deck of cards, and keep a deck with you. For me this is Go Go Go, Speed, and Klaberjass (as well as a couple single player games). Avoid games like go-fish, partly because everyone always knows them, and in other part because they aren't actually entertaining. All this is because you never know what kind of situations you'll get stuck in, and as a general rule, it's easy to start up a game of cards that isn't detrimental when you have to pick up and move on with your day.

Seven. Read books you don't want to. This is for readers, which I fully understand not everyone is. For the TV watchers out there, watch something you don't want to. Over the years we get stuck in a pattern. I generally read dystopian teen novels. This means that for every two books like that I read, I pick up one at Goodwill of a completely different genre. Recently I picked up Mr. Muo, which was definitely not something I'd generally read of choice. Not only did I actually enjoy it, I got a (albeit) satirical view into Asian cultures. Before that it was This Voice in My Heart and before that it was Getting to Maybe. For TV viewers or movie watchers, watch a 45 minute documentary on Russian Prison Culture (I did this last weekend, I'll never regret that choice), or the all-so-popular Supersize Me. If you normally watch stuff like that, watch a kid's movie or something like Labyrinth or The Dark Crystal- you'll expand your horizons, and maybe find something you never knew you enjoyed.

Eight. Be responsible to someone else of your choice. It's really easy to get in the routine of taking care of yourself and the things you're required to take care of, because well, you know what you need and want. But guess what? Being responsible to or for someone else can not only make you feel better about what you're doing, but it helps out that other person! It can be agreeing to eat at least one meal a week with another person (a friend and I trade off on Monday and Wednesday), volunteering, or agreeing to go to a city council meeting. Making sure you're accountable to someone for this is key. If you only volunteer when it's convenient, you'll never get to it. If you only attend a meeting when you feel like it, you'll be sitting on your couch come meeting time with a bowl of popcorn and not a care in the world. Being involved with other people and taking part in each-others lives will significantly make you feel better about your own, trust me.

Nine. Stay inspired. If what inspires you and motivates you is going on a run, go for it. For me, it's a fresh piece of art each week, whether it's printed off the internet or something I've done myself, I have a spot on my bulletin board just for that purpose. Seeing something new and inspiring just gets me going in my week, no matter how daunting that week is. Fresh flowers are also a favorite way of mine to be inspired- because I love love love nature. Staying inspired can be that you take an icy cold shower to wake you up in the morning or you make one absolutely delicious thing to eat once a week- it's up to you.

Ten. Last but not least, be happy with you. This can be the hardest thing out of all of this. You have your own way to make you feel happy and satisfied. My way is to listen to a playlist made by me, for me, cleaning up my space, and taking a shower. Those days when I look in the mirror and am just frustrated- and we all have those days, whether they're once a week or once a year, they happen- I set aside time to make me feel better about myself. I keep a $30 body scrub I bought in Paris just for those days. I read a portion of my favorite book, I sip on my favorite tea, and I remind myself why I'm awesome. You have your own way of doing it, and if you don't- FIND ONE. Notice how emphasized that is? It's because it's so important. Everything is all for naught if you can't look yourself in the mirror and count to 30 without looking away or feeling less than amazing.

So there they are. Long, maybe, but advice that I felt needed to be shared? Most definitely!

A year and Henderson

So,I was writing in my 5 year journal the other day, the one I mentioned when I first started this blog, after leaving Ukraine, and it donned on me that a year came and went, and it didn't even really register. It's been over a year since I left Ukraine, and longer than that since I made the decision to go in the first place- the day that I decided that how I was living was no longer satisfactory. I've always been an independent person, a characteristic which has drawbacks and advantages- but a year ago I decided that being independent was no longer satisfactory- at least the way I was doing it. Yes, I was on my own, yes, I was going to college, yes, I had friends and loved my classes- but wasn't everyone else at that University doing the same thing? Don't get me wrong, I didn't go to Ukraine just so that I could be different from the rest of the students at my school, nor did I go because I wanted to prove to myself that I could be more independent than I was then- although those were two selfish reasons that did cross my mind. I went to Ukraine because I had a heart to go. Ukraine wasn't my original choice, at first it was Nepal, then I got moved to a South America trip, then finally landed in the Ukraine team. I'll never know why it happened that way- why I ended up in Ukraine instead of any other number of places, but I did, and here I am, over a year later, still with questions.

 And I guess that's the point of me writing everything I have today, is because nobody knows why things happen like they do, not one person has all the answers- we're human, if we had all the answers, we wouldn't be human anymore- it's kind of a key characteristic. However, we have the answers we need, we always will. I know that I went to Ukraine for a reason. That's all I need to know. I know that I came home for a reason. That's all I need to know. I know that a year has passed, and it's taken me time to heal, for a reason. That's all I need to know. I don't need to know specifics, because they don't matter. What matters is that there is a reason, it's not all for nothing, because even if I was able to change one life, leave an imprint on one person- whether that be a staff member, a kid, or even an immigration agent that asked me why I even wanted to be in Ukraine, or heck, even someone here in the States that was blessed by hearing about what I've done- it was all worth it.

That being said, this being mainly a travel blog (hah, if you can even call it a blog, as little as I post), I want to share a bit about my weekend trip to Henderson at the beginning of the summer. It wasn't anything fancy- just four girls hanging out at a lake for a few days, but boy was it beautiful, and so much fun! Henderson is about a 4 hour drive from the metroplex, and a 6 hour drive from Abilene- a bit longer if you stopped for Chipotle like we did. Hey, can you blame a girl? Abilene only has Sharkys, and though the Abilene folk think it's the bees knees, I definitely start to crave Chipotle every few months. Anyways, we went to Henderson and stayed with our friend's Grandpa- who has a lake on his ranch property- we stayed indoors for a couple nights, enjoying the air conditioning and lack of bugs, but then trekked outside to camp for a couple nights- because who doesn't love the outdoors (for short ammounts of time, that is)?

                     




Anyways, the whole weekend was fantastic, and it was good to see our friend Regan before she went off on her summer adventures- and have roommate bonding time.

Next Post: Italy! I'll be going on a road trip with my family in a couple of weeks, checking out some major landmarks (like Mt. Rushmore!), and getting to see my brother in his new home in South Dakota. We'll be in Oklahoma, Kansas, Nebraska, Iowa (just driving along the border), and South Dakota.

Long Overdue

  So, If you haven't already noticed, I'm really bad at blogging. It's my goal this summer to catch up on blogging about my study abroad travels, so that I have this personal record, and so that other students or people considering going abroad can check out my experiences, and maybe it'll help their own. But first, a quick update on what's going on in my life currently. I am officially a resident of Abilene, I got a house with three other girls that I studied abroad with, and I'm really enjoying it, ups and downs! (P.S. I apologize for the instagram photos, I just don't have the energy to walk around taking pictures of things, and I already had these on instagram!)

 The dining room and kitchen were originally a very obnoxious orange color, and we kept the mocha color in the living room and hallways. The bedrooms were all painted a light gray to cover up their various colors (chocolate, dark purple, burnt orange, etc), curtsey of my dad and his paint sprayer. I'm really enjoying living in a home of my own, but I do miss the ease of living for free with parents, most definitely.

Since I've been back in the states I've taken a trip to Oklahoma to stay in a cabin for a few days in December, a trip to Austin to see an art exhibit that I had a piece in (just a sketchbook, nothing spectacular), taken a trip to Graham, Texas for Easter to do some mudding at a friend's ranch, went to Tarleton State University in Stephenville to participate in an Indian Holi festival, and visited Henderson, Texas for a lazy memorial day weekend on a friend's private lake (living the luxe life, I know). I'll get around to blogging about each of these trips eventually.

For those that are interested my tattoo was completed, back in December, in Oxford, and it will probably get it's own post eventually, because I've had a lot of people ask me why I got what I did, the meaning behind it, and there's just a lot more there than a short blurb in an update blog. It says "Not all who wander are forever lost." It's obviously a play off of the quote by Tolkien, from the poem All That is Gold Does Not Glitter, which is one of my favorite poems. I'm really happy with it, and Will (Villiam Gerbery) at Tigerlilly Tattoos (He's now at Oxford Ink) did an absolutely fantastic job, especially with the vague idea I gave him, the fact that I'm a baby, and it took over 15 hours of work over the span of four sessions.

 So I've already blogged about Ireland and Wicked, Bath and Stonehenge, and Croatia. I still need to blog about Spain, Italy, and Paris, not to mention the few trips I've taken since I've gotten back to the US and the reverse culture shock (it still hits me sometimes). I guess there's no better place to start than with Spain. Like I said in my Croatia post, there's going to be some graphic images from the bullfight, but I'll try to keep it to a minimum, seeing as it's not an experience I like to play over and over in my head. I'm glad I had the experience, it's just not one that I'll be repeating anytime soon, or ever. So, read more about Spain after the jump!

She Lives!

Oh goodness, it's been over a month since my last blog post! I hope none of you thought I was dead, because I definitely didn't plan on taking that hiatus from blogging. I'm so behind, it's embarrassing. Because it's been so long, buckle in for a long post, I do apologize. So, since my last blog post what have I done? I've gone to Spain with the entire Study Abroad group, which is about 30 people, maybe a bit more.  I've traveled to Croatia with a small group of six, which was truly fantastic because I got to know each one of them more than I was able to when we travel in a large group. Not to mention the ten days I spent traveling through Italy.

I was blessed enough to buy a new camera, since mine has been acting funny since the monsoon at the Cliffs of Insanity in Ireland, and the one I wanted was cheaper than I anticipated, which is a huge blessing. I was able to buy a Canon EOS 1100D, which is a DSLR, with an additional Tamaron zoom lens, which has been dubbed "The Black Mamba" by my friends. It's the ultimate stalking lens, which is a huge help when wanting to take pictures of things you can't get close to because you're in a bus, or on top of a city wall.
I've gotten tattoo number two! For those of you who don't know, I got a small tattoo over the summer, in white ink on my wrist that reads "enough" in handwriting quite similar to my own cursive to remind me that I am enough for Christ, no matter what. It was inspired by Matthew 5:5 (Message Translation) which says "You're blessed when you're content with just who you are- no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought." Tattoo number two is a piece on my feet, which isn't actually completed, but it's close to being done. It's two picture frames, one on the right foot of the lake near my home, and one on the left foot of the English countryside. It reads: "Not all who wander are forever lost." It's to remind myself that no matter how far I am from home, whether that be my earthly home in Lake Worth with my parents, or my spiritual home with Christ, I'll always find my way back. It's really a beautiful piece, and I'm refraining from posting too many pictures till it's completed and healed.

Other than those few major things I've been doing school and volunteering, nothing to exciting other than a couple long papers on ethical standpoints. Our ethics professor believes people argue best when they're arguing themselves, so we each had to write a paper on a topic that contradicts our personal beliefs, so I'm had to write pro death penalty, and it was quite a challenge. My other paper is on the morality of sexualized media, and why there should be stricter rules and regulations by the FCC to make sure we are protecting our children and youth. It's really great stuff, definitely the way I enjoy spending my weekends.

I'm going to skip over Spain and come back to it in another post, because it was such a long trip, packed with a ton of cultural insights and experiences (such as cooking classes, festivals, and bull fights). I also want to leave the option open for people to skip that post, since there will be some graphic images from the bullfight. I'll post about Italy as soon as I get my pictures gone though. Read more about Croatia after the jump!

Oh, Happy Day

It's Wednesday- by this time I've been up for several hours, planned some dinners, and gone to the open air market. I've bought a copious amount of produce, some cheese, and fresh bread. A quick stop at the grocery store and I've got chicken to feed us for dinner. It's just a typical Wednesday for me now- who knew? In three days will be the official 1 month mark for living here in the United Kingdom, and I love it. I know it's been a while since a post, but between schoolwork and travel, I've not had much time to sit down and reflect. Seeing as it's been quite a while- this will be lengthy, and you've been forewarned.

Many already know that I spent the past long travel break in the beautiful country of Ireland. We arrived in Dublin Wednesday evening, went out to dinner at a pub in the temple bar area that had great live music and probably the best fish and chips I've had since I've been across the pond.

Thursday morning we hopped on a bus- the now infamous Paddy Wagon, and started our tour of Ireland. Our first big stop was the Cliffs of Moher, although there were several stops at castles and ruins along the way. Let me just say, I was most looking forward to the Cliffs for the pure reason that they are the Cliffs of Insanity from The Princess Bride- one of the greatest movies of all time. When we got there, it was breathtaking- even if only for about 10 minutes. They weren't joking when they said the weather changed on a dime. When we first arrived it was sunny and beautiful, 15 minutes later we were soaked to our skin. All worth it for the views, however.

 From there we went to the County Kerry, spent the night, and headed out the next day to Blarney Castle to kiss the Blarney stone. For those of you who don't know, the Blarney stone is supposed to give you the gift of eloquent speech for 7 years, and after you give it an hour our two (and maybe a pint or two, according to our tour guide, Sean Murphy), you'll be blabbing away. Needless to say, to his chagrin, it didn't work in making all the girls from Texas sing songs for the bus over the microphone. I don't think any kind of stone or rock (regardless of the karats) could make me do that.

 

 After Blarney Castle we made the long drive back to Dublin, where we spent the night in the Temple Bar area again- enjoying the excitement of "culture night". We also spent the next day in Dublin, checking out Trinity College, where the Books of Kells is held. It was beautiful, and I wish pictures had been allowed, although I completely understand why they aren't. We walked around dublin taking in the sites and helping our friend Kalyn climb on a rock to sit with an Oscar Wilde statue, saw some street artists, and caught our flight back to the UK. All in all, it was a great trip- and if Ireland isn't on your bucket list- it definitely should be.

Fast forward a bit, and I've made my way to London as part of a class assignment- I spent most of my morning in Camden Markets, which is a very self-expressive place. Lots of tattoo shops (I'll be honest, I was tempted to get a number 2 on the spot), piercing stands, and illegal drugs- which for some reason, were openly advertised and I saw not one officer while I was there. It was just an interesting dynamic- I'd love to go back and spend more time there- I feel like I could people watch for days on end and never get bored.

Then, that night- we got to see Wicked. Yes, the play, the always amazing play. It was fantastic! I don't even know how to begin to explain it. The voices were better than the soundtrack, the effects were the best I've ever seen, and it was just an all-together fantastic night.

That's all the highlights of the past few weeks that I can think of at this moment. Next stop: Spain. I'll be heading out with the rest of my classmates on October 11th, and We will be staying in Spain till the 22nd. I'm definitely looking forward to it, and can't wait for the experience. After that is about a week of classes, then off to Croatia with 5 other friends for a few days. I'm definitely blessed!